Life was idyllic before Huxley came along. I’m not complaining as everyday is so rewarding, watching him develop is just a natural marvel. Just a little smile from him and the days problems are put to rest. The way his eyes light up when I get home from work makes my heart melt. Its love like I’ve never felt before but that doesn’t stop things (in the words of Peter Griffin) grinding my gears.
Below I’ve listed my top 10 pet peeves of daily life with a baby:
1. When he decides to piss the moment his nappy is off. I mean come off it. He patiently bides his time until you think the coast is clear then BAM. You are wet, he is dripping and a complete change of clothes is required.
2. Muslin’s adorning every piece of furniture around the house like they are a new home accessory. Not going to lie, I’ve blown my nose on a couple just because they are in close proximity.
3. CONSTANTLY sterilising bottles. Honestly, the microwave have never been used so much. Now Huxley is crawling and picking up every little morsel/scrap/bit found on any floor I think it’s a a little futile but will carry on with the guidelines set.
4. The way he causally flips his dummy down the back on the cot upon leaving the room after putting him to bed. Who knew baby’s had that much lung capacity to spit a dummy a meter or so. Cue screaming on both behalf’s.
5. Finding lost dummy’s. Like a needle in a haystack, how they get to some of the places they do is beyond me. I’m convinced Huxley’s secretly stashed a couple for the inevitable day when it’s time to give then up. Dummy tracker’s anyone?
5. His ability to make the biggest mess with any kind of food, however small. *baby wipe in hand ready*
6. Socks! Everyone knows what I’m talking about. Short of using elastic bands to secure round the legs (Hello, social services), I don’t think there is a way to keep them on his tiny feet.
7. Shit baby changing facilities in public places (excuse the pun). Annoying when dealing with poo-gate and manoeuvring in a space smaller than a shoe box. Even if retailers or restaurants have a changing table, it’s blatantly an afterthought and located in the most awkward position.
8. The annoying cry when he is over-tired – FFS. Just shut your eyes and sleep already. I promise you will love it.
9. Trying to get a nappy on in super quick time now he has the ability to roll over and thrust his bum/bits about/crawl away. Even the pull-ups are a chore…trying to get both feet through the holes, simultaneously, well bugger if I’m any good at it.
10. Romper poppers. Getting these lined up first time, correctly, is a skill that should be highly awarded for. I’m talking at least a commendation from the Queen for successfully managing 20 in a row.
Tell me if I am wrong but this list must be pretty similar for all new fathers out there? Someday’s these annoyances just go straight over my head but others i can literally see the red mist descending.
Let me know if you have any pet peeves that didn’t make the list? Are you a popper pro? Or, are you able to hunt out dummy’s like a magpie seeking something shiny?
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